I am sick to death of whiners bitching about Valentine’s Day. Unhappy that you’re single. Get off your couch and go meet someone. Or lower your ridiculous standards. You’re not rich or great-looking yourself, so what makes you think you deserve both?
Annoyed that you’re expected to provide gifts or a card or a dinner out? Stop being a stingy bastard. You’re the kind of guy -and you stingy fuckers are always guys- who grudgingly buys last minute birthday gifts at 7-11. If you’re not with a woman you WANT to shower with gifts, then cut her loose and go find one who makes you wish you could take her to Paris or buy her a first-edition of her favorite book.
It’s not about the money, either. Don’t even flatter yourself with that gold-digger nonsense. There’s a very good possibility your girlfriend or wife out-earns you. If that makes your balls shrivel up then go date the 7-11 clerk that sold you that shitty birthday gift.
And you there with your “it’s a Hallmark holiday. It’s so commercial” lament. Give it up. You with your iPhone and your TV shows that you just have to see, and your microbrews and trips to Costa Rica, you think you’re so deep? It’s okay to celebrate getting shit faced or watching sports or observing explosions in the sky, but celebrating romantic love is shallow?
All you Valentine haters need to get over yourselves. Bitching about it just shows the world you’re lovelorn, stingy, unhappy or a hypocrite. Instead, why don’t you STFU for a couple more days? It’s almost time to buy goofy green shit and pretend you’re Irish as an excuse to drink yourself into a stupor.