5 Signs You Watch Too Much Children’s TV

The sound of Barney's voice makes you want to open a vein.
You can no longer just dance. You must "dancey dance."
Gooble no longer makes you think of a sad sex toy.
You want to smack Tolee for being a whiny bitch.
Diego is starting to look hot.


  1. Ah the many, many reasons my wife and I decided not to have children 🙂 We’re leaving it to competent professionals like yourself 🙂

    Great post. Thanks for the early morning laugh 🙂

  2. How about, “When you try to pick someone up in a bar, you stick two eyeballs on your hand and say, ‘Oobi. You… friends?'”

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